Somewhere along the road to adulthood, many of us quietly stop playing.

Not that we don’t need it anymore, but responsibility matters more now. Deadlines, caregiving, bills, and emotional stress can stifle spontaneity. Being “the responsible one” adds to this invisible burden. Play begins to feel indulgent, even unnecessary. Research shows something important: play isn’t just a childhood luxury. It is a biological and psychological necessity throughout life.

But what exactly is play?

Researchers say play is something done freely. It’s for fun, curiosity, or exploration, not for work or duty. It focuses on the process, not just the outcome. It’s about the experience, not just the achievement. Play invites us to be present. It can be gardening without worrying about perfection, dancing in the kitchen, or sketching badly on purpose. It’s about laughing with friends, singing in the car, creating, imagining, or wandering in nature without a destination.

Dr. Stuart Brown, the founder of the National Institute for Play, says that play is just as important to our wellbeing as sleep. He suggests that a life without play can lead to depression, chronic stress, less creativity, and emotional stiffness.

This matters profoundly in adulthood.

Many adults live in a near-constant state of activation. The nervous system becomes conditioned toward productivity, vigilance, problem-solving, and survival. We become efficient, capable, and exhausted.

Play offers something quietly radical. It interrupts survival mode.

New psychological research shows that play helps regulate the nervous system. It shifts us away from long-term stress and emotional overwhelm. Playful experiences activate brain networks tied to reward, curiosity, learning, and emotional flexibility. Dopamine and endorphins are released. Stress hormones may drop, and the body feels safe and restored. Put simply, play reminds the nervous system that life is not only about surviving. It can also include joy.

This link between play and emotional resilience is especially important.

Playful engagement helps young adults improve their emotional intelligence, resilience, and wellbeing. Play lets us safely explore emotions, adaptability, humour, creativity, and uncertainty. In many ways, it helps us practise being human.

Interestingly, play also reconnects us to parts of ourselves that may have gone quiet.

For many, especially those dealing with long-term stress, emotional pain, or trauma, joy can feel unusual. The playful self often gets hidden under years of coping, caregiving, or just surviving. Yet healing does not only happen through insight. Sometimes it happens through rediscovering aliveness.

A laugh that arrives unexpectedly. Hands moving through clay.

Feet swaying to music. Curiosity returning after years of silence.

In this sense, play is not childish. It is restorative.

And perhaps even sacred.

In my healing work, I often see that emotional wellbeing grows not only from conversation but also from gentle experiences. These help people safely reconnect with themselves. In hypnotherapy, guided imagery and symbolic exploration help create imaginative spaces. Here, the mind feels freer and less defended. In Reiki and reflective healing, people often feel softness, space, and presence. Still moments can also be playful. They invite curiosity instead of pressure.

This matters because healing is not simply the removal of suffering. It is also the return of vitality.

The nervous system cannot remain in protection forever. Eventually, healing asks another question:

What brings you back to life?

Play may be part of the answer.

And importantly, adult play does not need to be dramatic or time-consuming. Research suggests even brief, low-pressure moments of curiosity and enjoyment can support wellbeing. 

These moments can include:

• Ten minutes of doodling 
• Walking in nature without counting steps 
• Cooking freely 
• Gardening 
• Telling stories 
• Sharing light humour 
• Enjoying music 
• Doing creative rituals

The key is not performance or perfection. The key is permission.

Perhaps the invitation isn’t to be childlike again. Instead, it’s about reclaiming what adulthood has made us forget.

Wonder : The ability to engage with life not only as a task to complete, but as an experience to inhabit.

Healing often comes not from trying harder, but from remembering how to play.

References

• Brown, S. (2009). Play: How It Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul.
• National Institute for Play.
• Ho, W.W.Y. et al. (2022). Influence of play on positive psychological development in emerging adulthood.
• HelpGuide (2026). The Benefits of Play for Adults.

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